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Update: just had a slight urge to win back my loss from yesterday but instead of having my account frozen at the online casino....

…and it’s 24 degrees and gloriously sunny today and I’m sitting here feeling sick and worried about last night’s gambling. only slept at 0300 and woke up at 9 am from the stress / guilt and that feeling of emptiness after loss …. so feel tired …. so not only a waste of money but also a waste of this beautiful spring day … .hope I read this back when I’m tempted again….I never want to experience this again…it’s also self-inflicted damage to my life so this stress isn’t necessary at all and I ended up having it myself the hand….it seems so simple: all I have to do is stop gambling…

no more gambling for 4 days….and counting.

Good luck with it, I’m now 41 days dry after 8 years of heavy gambling. It is starting to take less and less place in my life, after years I start to live as a ‘normal person’.

Make sure you don’t start with that tenner, because every euro you bet means that you maintain your behavior. After a certain time, the calm will return. You haven’t been gambling that long so stop before you get into bigger trouble, accept your loss. Trust me, it could be so much worse!

So stupid I started gambling online again. I’m ashamed and I can’t resist myself anymore. Why do I fall back into the same pattern every time. Another 500 euros gone! I can’t take it anymore. After a month of not gambling, I was stupid again. Sometimes I think what does it matter!!

I am a woman and I think addicted to gambling.  I've been pretty much in control of myself lately.  I have set a limit of €100 per month.  Yesterday, however, I found another site and luckily deposited “only” €50.  Now I regret again.  I've never been in debt, but a year and a half ago I was dumbfounded when I won $6000.  Of course I had to pay out immediately and I decided not to gamble anymore as this couldn't happen a second time!  After a few weeks I deposited €50 again and to my surprise my balance had risen again to €3000.  This is where things went wrong.  I lost that €3000, but I wanted to win back so I completely gambled the €6000 that I won earlier. 

Just closed all my accounts on gambling sites.

Hey,

I really hate myself for this too. And Tamam, if you’re getting that mad about my story, how mad must he be.

I’m going to tell now. I’m literally sick of it.

I have been a gambling addict for 7 years now. Very bad and I really want to get rid of it. I have been clean from alcohol for 3 years. Quit smoking six months ago. But that gambling. I just can’t seem to master it. I only gamble online. I don’t like casinos with people around me. I keep removing my banking app from my phone, but that doesn’t help either and I have to remain reachable, so throwing away the phone doesn’t work.

Anyone recognize this?

Today I lost my entire monthly salary again.  Over 2000 euros gone in a few hours.  The people in the casino will be able to laugh about it.  Not me.  I'm so sick of gambling.  That's why I've decided to stop altogether.  There's no way I can get back the money I've lost.  I literally lose 9 times out of 10.  And if I do win, it will start again the next day.  The moment you have money and start gambling, it is all so fun and exciting.  All hell breaks loose when you walk out the door.  I advise those who want to stop actually doing it.  We have the willpower ourselves.  The only way to screw up the casino is to stop going.  You don't win...

How are you now?

fair play,

On ‎29‎4‎2018 at 13:07 Gaal said:

fair play,

Have read your posts before.

Sorry you fell back. But we have to realize that it is a disease. I’m guessing ‘only’ a year but I’m completely destroyed by that. Wish I just continued smoking weed now and then but no.. had to get more intense. Drinking smoking gambling. The latter is the most dangerous addiction of all. Besides loss, you feel ashamed and guilty.

Fairplay I don’t know if it helps you but it does help me to know that you are not alone. You don’t see happy faces in the casino either. Everyone undergoes the same, what you win you eventually hand in.

I am really looking for support and really want to offer support.

The first thing we have to do is accept the loss. Forgetting becomes difficult but accepting is better. Then make sure you don’t go after it again. If you’re digging a hole and you want to get out, you have to stop digging.

I can count on one or two hands how many times I’ve actually broken down and that may have been 5% of the visits. In a year at intervals of 2 months. So basically you have to wait until you break.

I also gambled my salary in two days while I still have two months to pay the mortgage. I think I’m going to lose my house so don’t you dare look my kids in the eye.

I started gambling when I got divorced, so also as an escape. I wish it had never crossed my path really.. it’s bizarre I lost my job and got something with it. I brought everything to casino.

It feels good to be able to share my story and I really hope for mutual support. A gambler is so lonely

Hi Hal,

How are you now? Hope you still live in your house. It’s actually bizarre and I’ll do it even if your salary runs through it in a few days. And nothing left after that you sit again with a huge * feeling of sadness, anger everything.

Good luck to all of you

Hey,

Good luck, I managed to fix it. Now I have to stay strong and not gamble because I have more expenses than income but if I last two months I can build up again.

Thanks for your message

After an injury of more than a year, I decided to have a drink with guys from my neighborhood, and I also took a gamble….. Well the cliche story actually in the beginning it was a nice side effect for drinking , a ‘fun and exciting pastime’. So I went every week and from the age of 16 I could be found almost weekly in this pub and I therefore automatically started gambling every week where people already told me come and stand with us sometimes even literally had to be pulled away from that cupboard it was that bad then …. one thing led to another, think I spent more than 15k in that time, money that my parents had saved for me, …. in that time I started also with smoking and using coke …. This is still the case to this day (coke in the weekend now and then for a weekend not when I am, for example, a weekend away with my girlfriend or on vacation & smoke at least 3 times a week in bad weeks daily, in the end I have a certain indulgence I think, this applies to almost everything a lot of attention from girls/women and also badly handled from mn 15 to mn 25 many people hurt aimlessly with my actions, that’s the past luckily improved for years since I moved in together no longer v I used to see this as 1 big game now luckily no longer.

Dear jgs,

I was in a relationship until 2 years ago. a girl who found out between all my lies and deception that I gambled… instead of leaving we switched authorities is.. de Breijder, Gamblers Anonymous, psychologist, etc.

thank you for these words.. right now i don't think about gambling.. right now i'm only thinking about the people i've dragged into my problems... right now drowning in guilt... but gotta keep my head up now.. thank you!

42 minutes ago Cleo66 said:

You have to be very careful about how you feel right now. So that when everything is back on track, you won’t fall again. This is recognizable. The monster lays low for a moment . He wants to take advantage of you as long as possible so he stretches it as long as possible. So it strikes again. And then you have to think back to this feeling , you never want that again . So you slam that door right in his face.

Now don’t be too hard on yourself, pretend you’re your own best friend, you’re not going to spend all day combing everything he’s doing wrong.

Come on man you can do this

you’re also right about this, it’s a feeling that will wear off .. it’s because I personally spoke to everyone I met and I was honest with how or what … and the disappointment you hear or feel it will linger for a while .. but thanks for your uplifting words man! I will continue to post here from time to time…

I signed up for Tactus and followed group therapy.  Unfortunately I was the only one who is addicted to gambling among the other members.  There was no aftercare after that.  I don't really feel helped.  Informed my family and they manage my money and I'm on budget.  Despite everything, I am still looking for ways to gamble.  What I have now discovered is paysafecard credit and with it I can gamble online.  Yesterday my sister-in-law told me that she has lost my internet banking password.  She kept an eye on expenses and income.  And yes....abused and online gambling all night.  Damage has been limited, but I feel terrible!!  I don't want to do this anymore but I can't do it alone!!!!!  I have now signed up for online help.  Go back to the doctor on Monday for a referral to a psychologist and look for a support group.  I think that people here in the Netherlands fall seriously short when it comes to getting help.  Especially for gambling addicts. 

Good luck Rachel,

How are you Rachel?

On 6/9/2018 at 8:58 AM Rachels1976 said:

I think that people here in the Netherlands fall seriously short when it comes to getting help. Especially for gambling addicts.

I tend to disagree. I’m so glad I live in NL, otherwise I would never have gotten the help I needed. NL and Scandinavia are in the top 5 when it comes to healthcare. For gambling addicts, this may be a bit different. My experience is that if you know what you need, and this is also clearly stated in Addiction Care, you will also be offered that help. This requires your own initiative. That will also apply to gambling addicts. Do you have some idea of ​​what you might need in terms of support?

1. that is indeed what is needed

Hey Wilco thanks for your comment,

I haven’t been able to access my friend’s gambling account for a few days now.
Coincidentally he sends me today that from my last bets I have earned another 500€ bonus in some promotion with Blackjack.

Told him to cash it in immediately and deposit it into my account. Nice isn’t it, that 500 € is unexpected †
Also, I’m currently on a mission for 2 weeks and I should do 1 more week before my 15 day holiday break starts.

The party of the year in our village, that is a festival that lasts even 2 days this year !! is in 2 weeks.
So I’ve decided to play the 4th week here and help a colleague who wants to get rid of his “week” mission.

Calculated and because of that I quickly get another 900 € extra due to the abstentions. As it were, I now impose a very heavy punishment on myself, but I think I just have to feel it at these moments!

Have made a financial schedule with my future plan until September 2018 and I can make 25K savings until then if I stick to everything strictly.

I hope I really succeed this time.

hi aegon,

First of all, thank you for sharing your story. You write that you are military, so the words “battle” and “adversary” will not sound unfamiliar to you. Did you ever think that your strongest opponent would not have a gun in his hands but would appear before you in this capacity of a gambling addiction. I sense a healthy determination in you at the moment with action plans. You often see people doing this who have just had a big gambling slip and now they don’t want to go through that again once and for all. My advice to you is to prepare not only for the present, but also for the future. There will come a point when you are free, not on a mission. You have money in your account again, everything is back in order and then there is that itch again, that urge… . You get bored and think just let that slot machine spin 1 x again: Boom!, and there you go again, 1 x becomes 2 x becomes 10 x and you are in the same trap again.

Sounds crazy, but I think your military training might come in handy: prepare in a month or six months when you feel the urge to gamble again, set action goals for yourself how you are going to act and then sigh to resist. Anticipate…as you probably do in the military.

Much respect for your attempt to master your gambling addiction and good luck man: put it on!

regards,

lex

14 hours ago aegon said:

Hey Wilco thanks for your comment,

I haven’t been able to access my friend’s gambling account for a few days now.
Coincidentally he sends me today that from my last bets I have earned another 500€ bonus in some promotion with Blackjack.

Told him to cash it in immediately and deposit it into my account. Nice isn’t it, that 500 € is unexpected †
Also, I’m currently on a mission for 2 weeks and I should do 1 more week before my 15 day holiday break starts.

The party of the year in our village, that is a festival that lasts even 2 days this year !! is in 2 weeks.
So I’ve decided to play the 4th week here and help a colleague who wants to get rid of his “week” mission.

Calculated and because of that I quickly get another 900 € extra due to the abstentions. As it were, I now impose a very heavy punishment on myself, but I think I just have to feel it at these moments!

Have made a financial schedule with my future plan until September 2018 and I can make 25K savings until then if I stick to everything strictly.

I hope I really succeed this time.

You’re welcome, sorry for leaving my single and most important key point unanswered. I don’t think this is a coincidence. You can do what you want let that be clear, but I tell you this: “addiction you will not overcome alone” do with it what you want… good luck

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